Tag: mermaid stories

  • When Gods Feel (An Elspar Story)

    When Gods Feel (An Elspar Story)

    It was a vicious summer-storm night when he swam from home. Not alone.

    He carried the voices with him, prowling through his mind like an invasive species — wild and sharp of bite. Soon to overwhelm him… 

    Had overwhelmed him…

    Their voices — resonant and cruel, contradicting and pestering. Unyielding.

    So unyielding…

    He gave himself to the waves. To their justified karmic thrashing as they pummeled against his tail and chest, ripping scales from his flesh. White-foam punches. Over and over. Beating him down. No reprieve — not even to breathe. Not that he deserved to.

    Not for what he had done.

    Sink it down, he thought. Gods aren’t supposed to… feel.

    Lightning split the sky; thunder howled with the wind.

    And everything hurt. He was grateful for that.

    Another wave crashed down on him, like a verdict.

    His vision blurred, and pain bloomed in sweet numbing.

    The voices — finally — quieting…

    Until…

    A hand gripped his wrist and pulled him under. Deep, deep under.

    Through slitted eyes, he glimpsed a familiar figure.

    Ullian…? Damn. Thought I had escaped you…

    He let himself be pulled, and sank.

    Summer’s warmth was fainter here, in the darker, calmer deep — where the storm’s punches couldn’t reach. Typically, he didn’t mind. He often preferred the cold. Made him feel alert and alive. Powerful.

    But those were all things he wanted no part in tonight.

    Please, he thought, just one night away…

    “What’s the matter with you, Revion!?” Ullian held him by the shoulders, his black-gold-blue marbled face twisted with fury — and something resembling concern.

    No “my Rising”… hm? You must really be upset. Revion smirked.

    As Revion’s Right-Hand — sworn to protect and serve — Ullian’s tendency skewed towards reverent formality. Something he rarely deviated from except for when his emotions flared, which was becoming more and more common lately. Almost like he cared…

    Revion glanced surfaceward, choosing to ignore Ullian’s stern, nostril-flared gaze. He wanted to return to the surface, to his prior — and much preferred — predicament, being pummeled, punished, and bruised. The physical hurt less.

    “Revion,” Ullian said, forcing calm, “what are you doing? It’s not like you to compel Reefguards and take off like this.” Then realization struck, and his fierce eyes narrowed. “Something happened…”

    Revion grimaced, not wanting to remember.

    No. Not at all. Just learned that I’d unwittingly shamed a general into sending two hundred new recruits to their deaths. You know, like some brain-slit cretin.

    And worst of all — he felt. He just didn’t know what. Rage? Remorse? Pride? Even his siblings were roused to feel. Divided mostly. Their defining trait. Pim, his older brother and the reigning Emperion Emperor, had slunk from the haze of Pleasure Rooms to deliver a scalding reprimand so pointed and wrathful it burned itself into memory. Aleida, though… She says that’s just what Reefguards are for — to live and die in service to the empire. ‘Obedient and inconsequential.’

    His hands twitched, and the voices warred like thunder.

    Once more he flitted his eyes surfaceward. I just want to hurt so as to feel nothing. Nothing at all.

    Because there was more.

    Just before the storm broke, a report had come in from his rudimentary spy network. The boy who Revion had decided would be his future was apparently “emotionally entangled” with an Inkleon. A poorly-crafted, eight-armed poet — of all things! What does my love think he is, to sink so low? Autumn-rotted scum? Revion didn’t know whether to feel heartbroken, embarrassed — gods-forbid jealous! — or some sick warping of the three. It was all too much to hear. Too much to feel.

    And the voices. Won’t. Shut. Up!

    He said none of that, of course — honesty was unbecoming of the Imperial Heir. To anyone. Ever. His siblings’ one consensus.

    Ullian maintained a vice-like grip on Revion’s shoulder as though he were some quiver-fish intent on slithering away, which wasn’t far from the truth. Revion wanted to get away. That’s why he left. To get away from the mind-whirling misalignment of values in his imperial family. Away from his failures and heartache. And away from himself — something he had no doubt another foam-fisted ocean punch could assist him with.

    His problems were his to suffer. Alone. He knew that.

    But I’m never alone. He peered into Ullian’s annoyingly attentive eyes. Not even when I slither and sneak like a cowardly eel.

    “Don’t you ever want to slip away?” Revion asked. “Stretch your tail. Or test your strength against a storm?”

    “That wasn’t strength I saw. It was surrender.”

    That last word stung.

    Revion curled his lips in a sinister smile, but his heart thumped with a sick desire — for the very thing he could never have.

    “I’m a god,” he snarled. “Surrender has no place in my vocabulary.”

    Ullian nodded, seeming appeased. Though, his grip didn’t lighten.

    Not until Revion yanked himself free and rolled his shoulders back, head high, his tail stretched long. His whole body ached — he let none of it show.

    A god? He thought. Or a performer?

    “Shall we head back, my Rising?” Ullian asked with a bow, slipping back into formality.

    Revion remained where he was, floating amidst the ocean’s steady sway.

    I’m not ready. He chuckled to himself. All the power in the world, and there’s still so much I cannot do…

    Cal’s blue moonlight spilled across the surface, high above. And cunning struck.

    Revion could do nothing about the two hundred Reefguards — all of whom were probably already devoured and dead. Nor could he sever himself from the strangling snare that was his family.

    But… he thought, a smile tugging his lips, I can remind my love of his worth.

    “My Rising?” Ullian was respectfully insistent.

    “We’ll start back, yes. But once we get to the palace, I’ll need you to send a Messenger for me.”

    Ullian cocked his head. “Of course, my Rising. May I ask — where to?”

    “The Inkleon Library. My future believes he can settle for amethysts before I’m able to offer him my sapphires…” Revion kicked his tail and started home. “So, to remind him who he is — and what he means to me — I’ll need to shatter that amethyst.”

    The voices raged on in his mind, between demanding propriety and insisting on retribution. Yet his own purpose was anchoring enough to focus. There were some choices still left to him. Feeble graspings for control that his siblings would undoubtedly deem too petty and “inconsequential” to yank away or begrudge him for. One life was nothing, after all, when compared to two hundred.

    And it’ll be fun — breaking all eight arms…

  • Rising Arrogance (An Elspar Story)

    Rising Arrogance (An Elspar Story)

    This was Oming’s moment—like every moment was. To win.

    He tore through the kelp-forest like a comet through the night, pulsating and alive with lifelight. The tall summer-green stalks lined the raceway on either side of him, all dancing to the ocean’s sway, many subtly obscuring the twists and turns meant to trick and confuse him. Hooh. Huuh. But winning was like breathing. He was crafted for it. Perhaps that’s why he found this first race so comfortingly easy. 

    His every muscle sang with thrill and strength as he slithered and wove through the final few turns, then straight on towards the finish-line. Yesss! So much better than combat training! He was alone, the other racers all trailing far behind him. But this wasn’t about them. He dug deep, gave all he had. Strain screamed across every inch of his body, tight and burning, evoking the most glorious elation. 

    Almost… An exhale. 

    He won, a blur shooting past the finish-line to thousands of rapturous cheers and a mass rain of praise. He needed a moment to reign in his speed and slow himself before he could nonchalantly swoosh back towards the crowd and revel in his victory. But, as he slowed, so did the cheering. 

    Huh? 

    Murmurs trickled up from the spectators, with everyone looking at one another—but not at him. 

    Oming swam back, glancing around at the crowd, nonplussed. He spotted his eldest sister, Feii, easily enough. She floated high above the spectators, poised and regal in a tail-length cloak woven of black and green seaweed, her hands and ears and neck all weighted with jewels, and her ink-black hair restrained in a single long braid. She looked down at Oming, expressionless.  

    That bad, is it? 

    The race judge flitted his eyes between the two of them, his thick neck disappearing into his scale-flecked shoulders like a turtle cowering under the weight of some great uncertainty. His prolonged silence indicated that he expected his Tideress to make the call herself. But Feii gave no gesture and made no pronouncement. Only observed. 

    What’s the big deal? It’s just a race. 

    There was another shift in the crowd. All the murmurs had become notable grunts and groans—especially from the foul-faced Racing Guild masters, all exchanging furious glances with one another. 

    Oming crossed his arms over his chest, tension lining his jaw, shoulders bristling. 

    He met Feii’s gaze once more and, masterful concealer of feelings that she was, Oming just barely noticed the slight flaring of her nostrils. And he knew. 

    By Cal’s light! What is it this time? 

    A different sort of ruckus broke out in the crowd, and Oming jerked around to face it. Floating far in the back were a few of his rowdier older brothers, all accompanied by their friends, paramours, and Bonded partners. The whole colorful cloud of them cheered and beat their fists against their chests in clamorous celebration. Reluctantly, the other spectators joined in, and that’s what decided it. Oming had won. He had won the race he was never supposed to enter. For no one would dare dispute the emphatic decision of any Tide.

    Another racer shot past the finish-line. Oming knew who it was before they even reigned in their speed, though he couldn’t recall the racer’s name. The racer panted, his gills fluttering, his face long with exhaustion. Another racer finished soon after, then another. Each one in a similar weary state as they exchanged brief and breathy congratulations. When they spotted Oming and swam to present themselves—their expressions cold, their bows rigid—not one offered a kind word to him, their crown-Rising.

    Oming had sense enough to suspect that the racers were entitled to their displeasure, and so offered them each a congratulatory nod, thus releasing them to enjoy the celebrations. But, one by one, the racers swam off. Towards their lodging quarters. Shoulders slumped and looking more like deflated puckler-fish than the proud, high-placing racers they were.

    What’s got everyone’s tail so twisted? 

    Oming glanced once more at Feii. 

    She gave a discreet gesture, and two of her personal Reefguards swam swiftly towards Oming. 

    “Shall we return to the palace, my Rising.” asked the long, slender Reefguard, clad in armor cut from the earth-toned shell of a burrower-crab. 

    “Whatever.” Oming scoffed. “It was just a race.” 

    They swam surfaceward along the tall sandstone bluff that loomed over the immense kelp-forest below. Oming glanced over his shoulder to admire the raceway—from the finish-line under him to the starting-line far, far beyond the curve of the ocean-floor. For the average Serefian—a Dhargonian (with their seaweed-like appendages), a Skaltressian (with their dainty tentacles), or any of the others, really—traversing the distance of the raceway would have taken days of steady swimming, no breaks. But for Oming and the other Buroden racers, all with their gods-gifted speed, they had covered that same distance in just a few hours—Oming fastest of all, of course. Not that anyone seemed to care. 

    More racers crossed the finish-line as Oming neared the wide opening carved into the bluff. A few dozen more racers would filter in over the next few hours. Oming had hoped to stay and watch and offer them each his congratulations—usually such a gesture from a crown-Rising meant a lot to the commonkin—but, if the crowd and the earlier racers were any indicator, he supposed it was best to remove himself. 

    Why would I want to linger around such sore losers anyway? 

    They passed through the opening and entered the expansive carved-out cavern that was the Buroden Capital. His palace stood at the cavern’s heart, plainly visible even from the city’s entrance. Its grand sandstone walls, all richly colored with murals depicting the various heroic tales of his lineage, towered above the meager orange and brown crystal homes and establishments of his commonkin. White moonstones—property of his family, of course—glowed brilliantly in the glass-covered indentations that lined the cavern’s walls and domed ceiling. It was a quick, quiet swim to his home as many of the city’s residents were still gathered for the race. 

    Feii’s Reefguards escorted him to the grand hall and there they waited, floating just above the green marble floor. 

    Oming wasn’t usually one for nerves. He’d had most of them beaten out of him during the first brutal years of his speed and combat training. But there was some strange slithering sensation along his spine that almost made him long for another bludgeoning from his trainers. He couldn’t recall the last time he lost a match, but the old eels were sometimes still slippery enough to land an enlivening blow now and again. There was a pleasure in physical pain. Oming understood it, he could learn from it. And he much preferred physical pain to the razor reprimanding Feii seemed so Lais-lovingly intent on lashing him with every time he so much as slid a scale out of place.

    So, when she arrived at the palace, not alone, but accompanied by the most prominent Racing Guild masters, Oming almost managed to convince himself he’d slipped the grip from the tirade he had been expecting. 

    Composed and steady, Feii was a waveless spring morning engulfed in the blustery crosswind of the Guild Masters’ as they bickered about “lost winnings” and “racers’ ruined retirements.” Their pouty lip-flapping persisted until Feii assumed her place at the end of the great hall—then immediate silence. There was no disrespecting a Tide’s authority while in the position of presiding. The white moonstone light gleaming in their glass sconces shone on Feii, glittering across the scales of her tail and highlighting their myriad shades of brown and green. Like a polished emerald, her bright calmness filled the room—even soothed the tension in the Guild Masters’ shoulders. Though, contempt still brimmed their dark, beady eyes every time one of them met Oming’s gaze. He still didn’t understand their discontentment, but some voice deep in the recesses of his mind chided that their sneers were likely warranted.  

    Feii was still and quiet, contemplative perhaps. And when she waved Oming to her side, he went with a pit of dread in his stomach. She wouldn’t reprimand him in front of the Guild Masters, but he knew his sister for the schemer she was and despised being used in her politicking. Combat was his language. Not petty words and placations. 

    “My dear, sweet brother,” Feii said, taking hold of Oming’s hands, “Such joy I feel for your dutiful and selfless display of unyielding love and commitment to our commonkin.” She turned to face the Guild Masters, many of whom still wore displeasure despite intently leaning in. “When our devoted crown-Rising came to me to express his immense respect and adoration for our most renowned Racers and asked for the honor to bear unique witness to their unparalleled determination and skill, well, it was a proud and humbling moment, indeed.” 

    Oming had to suppress a laugh at how she beamed with such pompous radiance. Though, he couldn’t say it wasn’t convincing. Least not for the fools who knew no better. 

    Do you even know what you’re saying?

    “As the imperial heir’s Showcasing—” the word from his sister’s lips sent another slither down his spine, “—imminently approaches, my brother grows ever more committed to forging himself into a representative and a symbol worthy of the gods-crafted strength and indisputable brilliance so bestowed upon us all of the most enviable and beautiful Buroden commonkin. As ever and always, our humble family is most assiduously devoted to the wealth, the safety, and the interests of all over whom we so graciously have the privilege to represent and preside.”

    Feii remained smiling her prettiest smile, and Oming was certain he had not understood but half of what his sister had said.

    The Guild Masters all looked around at one another until the largest of them turned to Feii, bowed, then said, “Indeed, my Tideress, we are moved by our crown-Rising’s… adoration for the racers whom we represent; it is, however, his manner of witnessing the race that yet leaves some… curiosities lingering in the mind.” 

    Feii pursed her lips in a manner of contemplation. Fake as ever Oming’s seen. 

    “Curiosities?” Her tone might have sounded patronizing had she not spoken so softly. “What is so curious about a spectator exalting in the thrill of observing a race?” 

    The largest Guild Master held Feii’s gaze for a moment, appearing to consider her words. “Indeed, my Tideress.” He bowed, smiling. “Nothing curious at all.”  

    The others followed suit, though Oming spotted one or two nonplus expressions in the bunch. 

    Feii squeezed Oming’s hands and glanced quickly at the Guild Masters—all of whom were now staring at him—a clear indication that she expected him to offer a few words of his own. 

    What do you want me to say? I don’t know this arena…

    He opened his mouth, closed it again. 

    Feii’s top lip started to twitch as his silence dragged on. 

    Uh… 

    “Prior to the race,” his sister squeaked out, only a drop of disappointment in her tone, “My champion brother expressed his wish that the winnings from our family’s bets be donated to support the racers and their families in their retirement. And as it was he who selected Binnen to be the royal racer, who did so masterfully win the race, my brother would like to personally double his winnings as a token of his admiration and well wishes for Binnen’s remaining racing career.” 

    Would I? 

    Still, the Guild Masters stared at him. It was most unnerving, as if the oceans themselves would never dance again until he spittled some banal response past his lips. 

    “Yes,” he said, practically hacking the word out like an urchin’s quill. “I… that… is my wish.” 

    “So generous,” Feii said. 

    Appearing mostly satisfied, the Guild Master offered their parting curtsies, then left. 

    “Swim with me, hm?” 

    All Oming could do was sigh. “Sure.” 

    They swished towards the main corridor that branched off from the left side of the great hall, towards the royal family’s private chambers. Scenters floated along the wall interspersed every few meters. Each emitted from their body a soft white glow imbued with a sweet sunweed aroma. Oming scrunched his nose at the sheer weighty offense of the scent. 

    “Are you really this stupid?” Feii asked. 

    Oming bit his lip. He knew better than to speak when she got like this. 

    She would scold him a while to let off some bubbles, then slither off to her private chambers to slurp down three or four ink-bubbles before berating the staff with half-slurred grievances about some decorative family heirloom being left askew. Despite all of Feii’s elegance and grace when before the eyes of the court, Oming knew his sister. Knew her well. And as much as her pressures and pummeling expectations of him were often a strangling at his throat, he felt some kind of way about her. A bit bitter. And sad. 

    “There can be no more of this, Oming. None.” She stopped in the center of the corridor, not even bothering to look at him. “You couldn’t think of anything to say? Not a single kind nor composed thought. Nothing. The others can be fools—gods-know they already are, cheering like younglings of poor crafting. But not you. You are on the precipice of attaining the highest responsibility of all the nine clans, and yet you have not an inkling of what it is to rule. The imperial heir would have to be an imbecile to choose you—and he is not. So neither can you be.” 

    “It was just a race,” Oming said, his hands clenched at his waist. “And that ‘highest responsibility’ you’re so fixated on is just to squander myself as a glorified piece of arm jewelry and–” he gestured to his whole self, “I think I can handle that.” 

    Feii turned to him and something sinister flashed across her face. For the first time ever, Oming almost thought she was going to hit him. 

    “Feii, it was just a race. All I wanted was one race.”

    And I’ve never been able to talk like you can…  

    “Do you understand the disregard? The selfishness? The callousness of what you did to those racers? Those racers who spend their short, bleak, miserable little lives bleeding their lifelight to speed my messages, your messages, all messages across the empire?” There was a fury in her eyes Oming had never known she could muster. “There’s no competing with us, Oming. There’s no competing with you. You don’t bleed your life away like they do. You can’t not understand this by now.” 

    I do. I do… I just wanted to feel what it was like. To speed like that… 

    Feii looked like she wanted to say more, but said only, “The imperial heir’s portrait arrived for you today. I had them take it to your room. Go… disappoint me someplace else. And perhaps… Just once… Think.” 

    She swam off down the corridor, leaving Oming to his “thinking.” 

    And to that eerie slithering sensation down his spine…